It can be hard to stay on top of all the trends and terms that have emerged in the dating world over the past few years, from micro-cheating to broken-heart syndrome (okay, that last one is less a trend, more a genuine medical condition). Luckily, though, there are some slightly more positive examples of dating phenomena to be studied. Below, find everything you need to know about the nebulous and vaguely mystical concept of soul ties.
What is a soul tie?
A soul tie might sound complex, but just think of it like the Gen-Z version of the more familiar term “soulmate.” Relationship coach John Ryan De Oca has described a soul tie as “an intense spiritual connection between two people that results in a mutual learning experience.”
How is a soul tie different from a soulmate?
The phrase “soulmate” is generally understood to refer to just one person, which is A) a little stressful and B) not particularly aligned with the growing trend toward nonmonogamy and polyamory that we’re seeing in the dating world (particularly among daters under 30). A soul tie, however, can be hugely important to your growth even if the bond evolves or shifts over time. For example, you could share a sole tie with a friend, mentor, or a family member, not just a romantic partner. Even if your initial connection with a romantic soul tie is tinged with limerence, the theory of soul ties suggests that the importance of your relationship isn’t necessarily determined by its longevity. The fact that you’ve made a “deep and emotional spiritual connection” matters more than how long you were actually involved.
Can a soul tie be a bad thing?
Well, yes; any relationship, even one between two people who feel deeply spiritually linked, can hit the rocks if the parties therein begin to experience enmeshment (or, in other words, unhealthy connection without sufficient space for individual growth). The concept of a soul tie denotes a relationship that’s deeper than average, but that doesn’t mean you won’t have to do the work to keep said relationship healthy and communicative.
Can I create a soul tie using magic?
TikTok seems to think so. Personally, when it comes to love I believe in decisive action over incantations (Go for what you want! Either you’ll get it or you’ll know to move on!), but it couldn’t hurt to light a candle or two, right? (Or blow them out, if you’re hoping to rid yourself of a soul tie that’s gone bad.)
