Madonna says ‘nobody’ told her as a child hat her mom was dying

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Madonna has opened up about her mother’s death, revealing to fans in an emotional Instagram post that no one told her as a child that her mom was dying of cancer.

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The Queen of Pop paid tribute to her late mother nightly during her recently wrapped Celebration Tour when she played the song Mother and Father, per Entertainment Weekly.

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But the Like a Virgin singer recalled how her mother Madonna Louise Ciccone’s death at the age of 30 in 1963 affected her for the rest of her life.

“I stood on stage for 81 shows staring up at the beautiful face of my mother and wondering what she must’ve been thinking as she waved goodbye to me from her hospital window. I stepped into the station wagon and shut the door not knowing it was the last time I’d see her,” Madonna, 65, began her post, which showed her onstage during a Celebration concert, looking up at a photo of her mother, who died of breast cancer when the songstress was just five years old.

“Nobody told me my mother was dying — I just watched her disintegrate mysteriously and then she disappeared and there was no explanation except that she had gone to sleep which explains my tumultuous relationship with sleep,” Madonna continued.

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The mother of six went on to add that she’s had “a hard time letting go” as her own kids age, but added that she is thankful for her children — Lourdes, 27, Rocco, 23, David, 18, Mercy, 18 and twins Stella and Estere, 11 — because they helped her “manifest my dreams.”

“When I stepped out on the stage and looked up at my mother’s face every night. I said hello I said goodbye. I said Thank you I hope you’re proud of me. I said Please protect me and keep me sane,” Madonna continued in her post. “I would look up at. David’s Mother — Malita across the stage and have the same thoughts. Was I doing a good job? Is she proud of her Son? Am I the mother she would want me to be??”

She concluded by telling fans that motherhood wasn’t easy, but the experience meant everything to her.

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“No Easy way into the motherhood game. No manual or University Just trial and error and learn and succeed and then fail again. Finally the realization that they were raising me and not the other way around,” wrote Madonna. “I always laugh with friends and say motherhood = suffering. But it’s not a joke it’s the truest thing I’ve ever said. But I wouldn’t change it for anything.” she wrote.

Madonna’s Celebration Tour, which kicked off last October, came to an end earlier this month in Rio de Janeiro as she put on a free concert for her biggest crowd ever on Copacabana Beach.

“Here we are in the most beautiful place in the world,” Madonna told the 1.6 million people who attended the show. “This place is magic.”

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