Last spring, on a whim, I applied to be a substitute teacher. I thought it would be a good way to get involved at my kids’ elementary school beyond the occasional class party signup. And, despite having no background in education, I wanted to help out with the teacher shortage.
So, I turned in the paperwork — which moves like molasses, fyi — then took a one-day training session. As soon as I jumped in, I loved it. Yet anytime I tell friends I’m a substitute teacher, the most common reaction is, “Oh, wow, I could never do that.” But I am here to say: Yes, you can. Here are a few tips I’ve picked up along the way.
Lean into the flexibility. One of the best parts about substitute teaching is the flexibility to fit your schedule. In Tennessee, I make between $90 to $100 a day. Even if you go just once a month, you’re still helping out.
Showing up for a full day actually feels less exhausting than going in for a special event. Many parents have gone into school for lunch or Valentine’s Day parties, when the acoustics of the cafeteria are at full blast or the sugar rush hits an ultimate high. But most teachers run their classrooms like a tight ship, and the kids for the most part are a trained crew. So, by the time you show up, all you have to do is follow the lesson plan for the day and they’ll act accordingly.
Find your ideal grades. Kindergarten is chaotic yet sweet. First grade is delightful because the kids accidentally call you Mommy. But I found that second grade is my sweet spot. The kids are independent but haven’t started all the weird social stuff; and I can still do the math. And I was nervous about subbing for Special Education because I didn’t know how to navigate helping children with differing abilities. But I immediately bonded with the students, and I loved the one-on-one connection you can form with the kids in smaller classes, as opposed to facing 25 kids at a time.
Set boundaries with your own kids. If you’re going to be subbing at your child’s school, make a game plan with them ahead of time. It’s a love fest whenever I run into my younger children in the halls. But my 4th grader told me I am NOT allowed to say ‘hi’ to him at school; I should not acknowledge his presence or that I gave birth to him.
Get to know the school employees. I figured all the teachers would eat lunch together in the teachers’ lounge, like they do on TV. But everyone’s so spent, they mostly retreat to their own spaces for a few precious minutes of quiet time. However! There are still plenty of places to engage, whether it’s by the copy machine or in the library. The school admin team will be your lifeline; and shooting the breeze with the cafeteria staff has become the highlight of my day.
Don’t let down your guard. The students have a greater understanding of the system than you do. They’ll try anything to throw you off your game. Lunch at 10:30. Double recess breaks. Snacks in the loft. They’re ruthless. Fortunately, every classroom has at least one student who will be there for you. He or she is the one you can lean on to tell you if something is off.
Come up with your own gimmick. Here’s one of those little details that goes a long way. I make it rain with stickers. One fifth-grade teacher I know does personalized doodles on her kids’ tests — talk about a pro move.
Go easy on yourself. There will be days when kids show up and just don’t want to be at school. One may look up at you with her jack-o’-lantern teeth and flawless skin and tell you she hates your glasses — don’t take it personally. And there’ll be times when you’ll have to improvise. When the kids ask me something I don’t know, I think it’s okay to admit you don’t have all the answers.
Toby Rose is a writer and mom of three in Nashville. Her work has appeared on goop, Real Simple, and Parents Magazine. You can follow her @tobyfels.
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P.S. A formula for easy lunchbox packing, and how to help ease kids’ separation anxiety.
