In 1952, the American Protestant minister Norman Vincent Peale published The Power of Positive Thinking, a self-help book intended to help readers develop greater optimism. Its tips included, “Picture yourself succeeding” and “Think a positive thought to drown out a negative thought”. The book, light on science and heavy on unsubstantiated anecdotes, was widely criticized by mental health experts at the time. Many called the techniques simplistic and ineffective, and denounced Peale as a conman. Nonetheless, the book spent 186 weeks on the New York Times bestseller list, 48 in the No 1 spot
Despite the substantial criticism of his concepts, it’s not hard to spot Peale’s continued influence today. It’s on social media, in viral manifestation practices and “lucky girl syndrome”. It’s in marketing for fitness tracking apps and multi-level marketing companies. And it’s in politics: Donald Trump grew up attending Peale’s ministry in Manhattan, and has described him as “the greatest guy”.
All of this can make positive thinking seem, at best, like a marketing scheme, and at worst, a tool for world leaders to empower themselves as they rend the fabric of society. “Toxic positivity” has become a buzzword in recent years, and critics have pointed out the myriad flaws of a “just be positive!” approach to problems. At the same time, studies have found that optimism is associated with better mental and physical health outcomes.
So what are we to make of all this? Is a positive mindset good for us or neutral at best? How are positivity and optimism different? And is there a sensible way to cultivate a more hopeful outlook?
What is a positive mindset?
Though positive thinking – the practice of focusing on the positive rather than the negative – and optimism are often used interchangeably, they are slightly different.
“Optimism is a relatively stable personality trait,” explains Dr Carsten Wrosch, a psychology professor at Concordia University who has studied optimism. Optimism, he says, is not an emotion; it is a way of seeing the world, an expectation that the future will be good rather than bad.
What determines whether you have an optimistic personality is complicated. It’s partly genetics, says Wrosch. It also depends on your early childhood interactions with your caregivers – relationship dynamics that form the foundation for whether you expect good or bad things to happen – as well as your life experiences. As Whitney Goodman, therapist and author of Toxic Positivity: Keeping It Real in a World Obsessed with Being Happy explains, people who have experienced trauma or mental illness can often be labeled as negative. “But it’s just a result of the experiences that this person has had in the world, and anyone might orient themselves that way if they had those experiences.”
So positive thinking will come more naturally to some people than others.
What are the benefits of optimism?
Optimism has been associated with many positive health benefits. Wrosch says this is due in part to how optimists handle stress. For one, he says, optimists are more likely to successfully overcome challenges because they are less likely than pessimists to engage in avoidant behavior. If you are having relationship problems, for example, and you believe there is hope for a positive outcome, you are more likely to address the problems directly rather than sweep them under the rug. And if a stressful situation is out of their control, optimists are more likely to accept it and either remove themselves from the situation or come to terms with it.
Optimists have also been found to create more supportive social networks, Wrosch says, which in turn further helps them deal with adversity and contributes to their overall wellbeing. He says there is also data to suggest that optimists put more effort into their relationships, and therefore get more support in return.
One of the greatest benefits of optimism is that it doesn’t carry all of the negative health effects that come along with chronic stress and negativity. “Thinking negatively and going down that rabbit hole starts showing up in your body physically,” says Amber Dee, the founder and CEO of Black Female Therapists. Dee says symptoms can include short-term effects like breakouts, fatigue, stomach aches and headaches; in the long term, chronic stress has been associated with increased risk of heart disease.
What is healthy optimism versus toxic positivity?
“I think [positivity] was really weaponized to be this cure-all for any problem, any ailment in the world,” says Goodman. She says she started her work on toxic positivity because she was seeing so many of her clients berating themselves for not being more positive, no matter what difficulties they were experiencing. “There was this feeling of, ‘I should be more positive, I should be more grateful,’ and they were almost punishing themselves when that did not come easy to them, or they were not able to fix a problem through positive thinking.”
This pressure to be cheerful has especially been weaponized against minority communities, says M Nicholson Battle Jr, a counselor and president of the National Association of Black Counselors. Battle says that in workplaces, for example, many people of color feel pressured to exaggerate their positive emotions and downplay their negative ones in order to be heard. “We have to be overly happy, overly excited, overly positive just to be seen on the same level as everyone else,” he says. “We can’t point out the fact that something bad could possibly happen, because now we’re being negative. Where other folks can be passionate about something, we’re angry about it.”
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Toxic positivity, in other words, is used by yourself or others to drown out all other emotions and experiences.
“A healthy degree of optimism would be when we’re able to hold space for reality, our fears, and our concerns, and the potential for things to work out and go well,” says Goodman. “It becomes unhealthy when people are unable to hold any emotion that isn’t positive.”
How do you effectively cultivate positivity?
According to experts, the method is a little counterintuitive: cultivating healthy positivity involves making space for negative emotions.
“The people who tend to struggle with optimism the most are people who are shaming themselves for their feelings,” says Goodman.
Sitting with negative feelings can be tough for people who didn’t grow up learning to do it, and Goodman says therapy is helpful for learning the skills. But the first step, Goodman says, is figuring out what you’re actually experiencing. “Learn how to label your feelings, and learn what that experience is like for you, physically and mentally, when you’re having negative feelings.”
Experts also recommend managing our expectations, and being clear about what you want and what makes you happy rather than pursuing what social media or commercials say will make you happy. “Be realistic,” says Dee. “How can you take actionable steps towards that, and then celebrate your progress along the way? Even the smallest steps help.”
Battle adds that it’s also important to look for positives, no matter how small they may seem. “It can literally be: this morning I woke up, I brushed my teeth, I washed my face, and I got out the door on time,” he says.
Finally, Dee says one of the most important parts of having a positive outlook is community. “A mindset is really cultivated in your social environment,” she says. “Surround yourself with people who genuinely support you and trust you and that you trust.” If you’re still struggling with chronic negative thoughts, she adds: “I’m biased, but reach out to a therapist.”
